What Babies Know About Joy That Adults Only Feel at Christmas

Sarah
Dec 13
3 min read

How early emotional life shapes the way we experience wonder, nostalgia, and the holidays

Every year around Christmastime, adults talk about magic.

The magic of the lights. The magic of traditions. The magic we hope our children feel.

But here’s something worth pausing on: babies and toddlers don’t need Christmas to experience wonder.

They live in it.

All year long, young children meet the world with curiosity, delight, and emotional openness. They are moved by small things—shadows on the wall, a familiar voice, a new sound, the surprise of cause and effect. Meanwhile, adults often need a holiday, a ritual, or a memory cue to access similar feelings.

This difference isn’t a failure of adulthood. It’s developmental. And understanding it can help us rethink not just Christmas, but how we experience joy more broadly.

Babies and Toddlers Are Wired for Wonder

Parents see this all the time.

A baby staring at light moving across the wall.

A toddler stopping mid-walk to crouch down and examine a stick.

A child utterly absorbed by something adults might barely notice.

What research helps us name is that this isn’t just “being easily entertained.” Even very young children are capable of a deep kind of wonder—an emotional state that pulls them toward curiosity and exploration. Studies show that when children encounter something that feels big, new, or surprising, they don’t just get excited; they become more focused, more curious, and more motivated to engage with the world (Anderson et al., 2024).

In other words, your child isn’t distracted. They’re learning through wonder.

Adult Joy at Christmastime Looks Different — and That’s Okay

Adults really do feel joy at Christmas. It’s not fake or forced.

But adult joy works differently than a toddler’s joy.

For a lot of us, it comes through memory. A song plays. You pull out an old decoration. You do something the same way you’ve always done it. And suddenly there’s this feeling — warmth, comfort, connection.

Our brains are wired to link certain sights, sounds, and rituals with past moments of closeness. So adult joy often isn’t just about what’s happening now — it’s about what it connects to.

That’s different from children. Babies and toddlers don’t have decades of memories. Their joy is in the moment. Pure discovery. Adult joy is quieter, reflective, more layered. Less about “what is this?” and more about “this matters to me.”

And that’s okay. Both kinds of joy are real — just coming from different places.

Where These Two Worlds Meet

This is where children quietly teach us something. Not how to make Christmas magical, but how joy works in the first place.

1. Joy Lives in the Present

Kids don’t wait for a holiday to be captivated. Adults often chase the feeling instead of noticing what’s happening. When we slow down — really notice warmth, light, laughter — we tap into that same system that supports early joy.

2. Wonder Comes From Curiosity, Not Perfection

Children approach the world with curiosity, not expectation. Adults often approach holidays with checklists or “how things should be.” Letting go of perfection opens space for real connection and delight.

3. Connection Matters More Than Tradition

For young children, joy grows out of relationships. Emotional safety, attunement, and connection are what let joy settle in. That’s true for adults too. That's available year-round, too.

Rethinking Christmas (and Joy) Through a Developmental Lens

Babies and toddlers experience wonder and delight every day. Adults often wait for a holiday to feel it.

What if the invitation isn’t to recreate childhood magic — but to learn from it?

Joy doesn’t have to be loud, perfect, or seasonal. It can be small. It can be relational. It can be here.

And that kind of joy — grounded, present, shared — is something worth practicing all year long.

References

Anderson, C. L., et al. (2024). Children’s experiences of awe and curiosity. Child Development, 95(4).

Yang, Y., et al. (2023). Awe and prosocial behavior in children. Journal of Experimental Child Psychology.

Sedikides, C., & Wildschut, T. (2019). The sociality of nostalgia. European Review of Social Psychology.

Sedikides, C., et al. (2015). Nostalgia: Conceptual issues and existential functions. Current Directions in Psychological Science.